Yup......

So, I thought I would have loads to say, and maybe I do-but my mind has gone blank. I feel sad today. It was the end of something I hadn't realized I cared so much about. I don't often form attachments-one of those survival things I guess. Everything changes-it's the only thing you can count on. And this time in my life seems to once again prove that. So forming attachments means being sad at some point. And now is that point. I am sad.

I really, really thought I would be ok. I had only worked there a year and a half. And this morning was ok-got some ballons, a card, and a gift, had baked goods(made especially for me!), lunch was bought for me.......it was awesome. And somewhere in the middle of it I realized that not only did these people truly care about me, but I care very much about them, and not seeing them everyday was going to break my heart. And I got sad. And I am still sad. The only thing preventing me from have an actual breakdown is the knowledge that after next Friday-that entire situation will not exist. After the merger-everyone will scatter. Everyone. I was just one of the first to go. Next week, everyone goes.

It sooths my heart to know that. It makes me a little less sad. I didn't leave them-I didn't have a choice. No one did. And at the end of the day, they are happy for me. The balloons didn't say 'We'll Miss you" or "Good Luck". No-my friends got me balloons that say "Congratulations". They are excited for me, and that makes me appriciate them even more.

I already miss them.